I think I died a long time ago.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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