And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
