It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize