my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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