So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
