Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Randomize
