Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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