Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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