i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Randomize
