So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
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