his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
