How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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