I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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