doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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