her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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