My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Randomize
