Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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