im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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