I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
