he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Randomize