i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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