real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize