From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
