member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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