New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
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