You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
