Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
