she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
