I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
