In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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