READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
