There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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