hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
