There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Randomize
