everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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