I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
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