the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
