i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
