garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
