We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
My bed smells like the plague
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
