i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Randomize
