is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
