Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
50% drunk capacity currently
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
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