it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
dude i'm inner monologue high
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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