whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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