Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
