I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
