she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
