I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Randomize
