Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize
