I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
