at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
