Who did Billy Mays play for?
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
