i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Randomize
